tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1802896743878321184.post233334308591882031..comments2023-08-19T01:00:21.479-07:00Comments on Love. Learning. Liberty.: crappy home school marriagesshadowspringhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15172112981244682382noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1802896743878321184.post-63229192233039356432010-01-22T21:55:43.343-08:002010-01-22T21:55:43.343-08:00Shadowspring, what motivated your husband to seek...Shadowspring, what motivated your husband to seek help? Most men are so satisfied with getting their way, they wouldn't THINK of changing anything. <br /><br />Those are amazing stories. I'd like to remind everyone, "Be sure your sin will find you out." <br /><br />"I know dozens if not hundreds of home school families that have perfectly fine marriages AS FAR AS I CAN TELL No doubt some are even great! =)"<br /><br />Your comment "As far as I can tell" is so on-target! Abusers usually look so good on the outside. But we never know what is happening behind closed doors when no one else is around. At least 1 in 4 women are abused in their lifetime. That includes Christian women, church women. Some statistics say the number is much higher, that 1 in 4 is only physical abuse, and that when one includes non-physical abuse, the number is one in 3, and even possibly 50%, or 1 in 2. <br /><br /> As I sit in church, I wonder Which women are sufffering abuse currently, and which suffered domestic abuse in the past. If there are 4 couples on a pew, one of those wives likely exerienced or is experiencing abuse. <br /><br />As I sit there, I look at the hsuband who has his arm around his wife. I wonder if he is actually abusing her at home. Is she secretly cringing, wishing he would remove his arm and move to the other end of the pew? Or is she just glad that he is being loving for the moment? <br /><br />And what about the couple who keep their children between them? We often don't know who the abusers are. Most of them hide it very well in public. <br /><br />Sometimes we can see the abuse. I think of the wife who had to keep an eye on her husband after church. The second he neared the church doors to go home, she had to leave. Her nervousness told the story; she was afraid of his anger if he had to wait 2 minutes. Because of this, we never could get into a good discussion. My guess is that as soon as he saw someone talking to his wife, he felt the need to get her out of there. <br /><br />Later, when he got sick and went to the nursing home, and made awful derogatory comments about his wife, one of the staff (who had gone to his church all those years) finally became aware that he was horrid to his wife. It seemed most everyone at his church dismissed his behavior as just one of his quirks. But the first Sunday I went to that church and talked with him and his wife together, I sensed his disrespectful attitude toward her. (But then I have much more experience in recognizing domestic abuse than most.) <br /><br />If I can learn to recognize abusive behavior, so can others.Waneta Dawnhttp://www.wanetadawn.comnoreply@blogger.com